S3x in the Church part 1: full transcript and answers

▶ 0:00 Today we’re going to be talking about sex. Paul spends half of this seminar on division and sex. Half of this book is talking about division and sex. And so it was an important issue back then and so it’s what an important issue today. So we’re going to talk about sex. Do we stay single? Do we hook up when we want? Or do we get married? Now, he is going to clarify unlawful sex as is Paul’s style. He gives illustrations about things and he’s going to give us an illustration about sexual immorality, why it’s wrong without using sexually transmitted diseases and and hurting your spouse and and hurting your family and all the rest.

▶ 0:52 He’s going to give a whole different approach to why sexual immorality is wrong. Whether it is adultery, incest, animals, homosexuality, orgies, or whatever. He’s going to tell us another reason why unlawful sex is wrong. He starts out by saying in 1 Corinthians 6:13, the body, this physical body, is not for fornication or unlawful sex, but it is for the Lord. And God raised up Jesus, that body, his dead body, and will raise us up by his power. See, when Jesus returns again, our bones [clears throat] are going to come back together. Our flesh that has decayed to the dust is going to come back together to be flesh. And we’re going to come out of the graves.

▶ 1:46 And this body without blood is going to ascend up to meet Jesus Christ. Hallelujah. And we’re going to be welcoming him. And so he’s saying that body, even though after you’re dead, that body is belongs to the Lord and he’s going to resurrect it. Isn’t that beautiful? And our young ones need to understand that that there’s a day coming when the graves are going to open and the dead in Christ are going to come out of there and their spirit’s going to be joined back to their body. An immortal body, a body that can’t die anymore. Not this body, but this body putting on immortality. And he goes on to give the second point. Your bodies are the members of Christ.

▶ 2:37 You see, God forbid that I take the members of Christ and, you know, join myself with a harlot, a prostitute, a [ __ ] a loose person, a a sexually immoral person. [clears throat] Now, the scriptures back that up in 1 Corinthians 12:27 says, “You are the body of Christ and members in particular.” Hallelujah. See, we are the body of Christ. We are part of his body. In Acts 9:5, when Paul was persecuting the Christians, Jesus appeared to Paul on the road to Damascus and Jesus said, “Paul, why do you persecute me?” Paul answers and says, “Who are you?” You know, we need to know Jesus.

▶ 3:33 Let’s see. Paul was a Pharisee. He was a Jew. He was a religious man. But he didn’t know Jesus. And when Jesus came, he said, “Who are you? Who are you?” And he says, “I am Jesus whom you are persecuting.” Now, was Paul persecuting Jesus directly? No. Because Jesus is in heaven. Who was Paul persecuting? The church, the many membered body of Christ. See, Paul proves his point that we are the member, our bodies are the member of Christ. And so, we shouldn’t take our bodies that are part of Christ and join with sexual immorality, sex acts. Now, isn’t that good? Paul has some very good illustrations.

▶ 4:27 He’s he’s he’s quite a guy. He is very phenomenal. Now he which is joined to a harlot, an immoral person, is one body. For the two, said he back in Genesis, shall be one flesh. So when we join sexually with someone, we become one flesh. [clears throat] And he goes on to say to flee fornication, every sin man does is without side. It’s outside the body except fornication. See sexual immorality is the joining of two people and happens inside the body and that body belongs to who? Jesus. So he says no believer should take the body and commit unlawful sex acts whether it’s incest, homosexuality, adultery, sex before marriage, sex with animals.

▶ 5:24 He says we should not do that. Besides the venereal diseases, the sexually transmitted diseases and the breaking of homes and the breaking of hearts. He says this is a reason not to commit sexual unbeliever. Believers do not do that. He that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit. See, we have that intimacy with the Lord in the spirit. Your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost. You’re not your own. You’re bought with a price. You can’t do what you want to do anymore. Therefore, glorify God in your body. Now, how is he saying to glorify God in your body? By not committing sexual immorality. Amen. I think he’s a great teacher.

▶ 6:17 I’m glad I’m his microphone. [clears throat] And glorify God in your spirit. See, there’s a lot of people, a spiritfilled people especially, you know, we like to get into the ghost, but our mouth and our body, we just do crazy things with it. And Paul says, “No, no, no. You know, you got to do this both with the body and the spirit.” Could that be an amen? See, it’s the body that’s going to help my family, my neighbor, those around me. It’s not my spirit. It’s what I do in my body,. Which are God. See, both of them are gods. So, believers don’t hook up. No one night stands, no living together for sex, no homosexuality, no incest. They get married. Can I hear an amen? Now, is Amen.

▶ 7:08 Isn’t didn’t he give a good argument? Yes. Absolutely. Now, chapter 7 is totally given to Paul’s own opinion. And he’s going to tell us it’s his opinion. Okay? And I’ll tell you something. He has some insight here that churches need to hear. Churches are killing people because they don’t understand some things. They’re putting them under bondage that the people cannot live under. And Paul is going to bring some clarification here given his own opinion. And watch how skillful he does this. Are you ready? He starts out by saying, “It is good for a man not to touch a woman.” Now, that word touch does not mean to run your fingers through her hair, hold her hand. It’s not that kind of touch.

▶ 8:00 It’s attaching to the woman. It’s a sexual act. See, it’s good for men not to do that. All right. Now, watch. That’s his idea. That’s his plan. That’s good enough said, but how many you know it’s not easy to carry out. Me, I’m the only one. Yeah. Now the problem the problem Paul says is fornication sexual immorality. See to avoid sexual immorality. See if you don’t attach yourself to a woman and get married and have sex you are in danger of committing sexual immorality. So he says that’s the problem.

▶ 8:54 So he says, “Let all have their own wife and their own husband. That’s part of the solution that you get married to the opposite sex.” Okay? Not your sheep and not some man in the neighborhood or some woman in the neighborhood that’s the same sex, but the opposite sex. Can I hear an amen? Now, he’s talking to a city that thinks just like we do today. Okay. Now, what is the solution? Don’t just get married, but when you get married, the husband is to render to the wife. Do sexual benevolence, sexual affection, and likewise the wife to the husband. He says, “Get married and have all the sex you want.

▶ 9:46 Upside down, you know, in the kitchen, in the living room, in the back, I don’t care. Just live it up. That’s what he’s saying. Cuz see, you can get married and still if you don’t fulfill that sexual appetite, you’re what? Going to have problems of committing fornication. Church, this guy has some good insight here. Hallelujah. So, the result is Satan won’t be able to tempt you and get you to fall for your lack of self-control because you’re having sex and fulfill that desire, that appetite in God’s plan of marriage.

▶ 10:46 Now, that’s good stuff. So, it’s important. He says for husbands to fulfill the wife’s sexual desires and the wife to fill the husband’s sexual desires. So you what? Don’t fall into the temptation of Satan. You beat him. You conquer him. Hallelujah. Now, we got to remember, I [clears throat] forgot to mention it, but in verse one, it’s good for a man not to touch a woman. In verse seven, he says it’s the gift of God. U let me give you some stats. In America, 41% of Americans 18 and over are single. Unheard of in the 50s. 61% of those never got married. Or 25% of Americans today are not getting married ever. One out of four people. And 51% of women are not married. See, the American [clears throat] culture is moved to where marriage is not the thing.

▶ 11:45 Just shacking up, living together, you know, hooking up and uh no commitment. And uh [clears throat] I looked up a single men survey and uh what they said about it. And these single men, most of them said they are scared to marry because of all the bad marriages around them, all the arguing, the divorces, and the bad finances after a divorce, after a divorce to build your credit back up. And this is true. When my first left me, my first wife left me and ran off with another man, it really destroyed my financial future. It took me several years to build that back up because she took my credit card and got into debt and run all these thousands of dollars up and then left and left me with the bills.

▶ 12:38 And [clears throat] so, you know, guys see this and uh you know, you get a divorce, everything’s split two ways. Well, when you split half of a little bit, you wind up with nothing. And so, they’re scared. They are scared. And Paul’s going to give solutions to this stuff. And besides this, they say they get more sex than married men do. And see, sex is free today. Women are, you know, having sex with with no, you know, no problems, unrestrained. And so men don’t have to be responsible. They don’t have to be committed. And they [clears throat] don’t tell you about the 50% of sexually transmitted diseases they have.

▶ 13:31 And they don’t tell you about not having kids and having kids that you do not want and uh so forth. There’s a lot of misery in that choice. Now verse six, he says, “I speak this by permission.” See, he’s not speaking it by the law of the Lord. He’s speaking of permission that God gave him permission to tell us his opinion. Okay? Now, that’s a big difference than just, you know, we give our opinions, but you know, God God ain’t in them at all, just our opinion. But he says, I’m giving you stuff by permission. And it’s very important. He’s going to bring some insight that most American Christians do not have. And many are under horrible bondage and living difficult lives because they don’t understand this.

▶ 14:23 Are you with me? I would that all men were even as myself. Here’s his second appeal. To stay a virgin or stay single by that gift of God. But every man has his proper gift. One after this manner and another after that. Now that word gift is the same gift for the gifts of the spirit. Gift of wisdom, gift of knowledge, gift of prophecy, gift of faith, tongues, interpretation, healings, miracles, discerning of spirit. Same word in Romans 12. Same word. Gift of giving, gift of showing mercy and so forth. Are you there? So that is a divine enabl that is an ability you can have. He is saying to stay single until you find the right person to marry because if you just marry for sex, you can marry an idiot.

▶ 15:17 And we’re not supposed to marry wrong just so we can have sex. And so he’s teaching us that there is an ability in God. To hang in there until the right time. Can I hear an amen? Powerful. Very powerful. Now [clears we’re throat] going to jump over to verse 10 because I want to get the Lord out of the way here. The Lord commands, “Let not the wife depart from her husband.” And this is all through the Bible. And if they do depart, remain unmarried and then reconcile and so forth. And that is the scriptures. And this is why so many people are beat up because nowhere in the scriptures except where Paul is bringing this out clearly, do we get clear understanding of a marriage in the Bible, especially one that goes wrong.

▶ 16:16 Are you there? Okay. Are you interested in his answers? Okay. This is what the Lord says. He says, “Yeah, we shouldn’t divorce and all that.” But he says, “I say to them, here’s my opinion. Here is my idea. Here is my plan. I say to the unmarried and to widows, it is good for them that they abide even as I.” And see, he he was single. He stayed unmarried till the day he died. But if they cannot contain, if they cannot use self-control, see we have a gift and then we have what? Self-control. Say it. Self-control. Self-ontrol is just controlling yourself, listening to your heart, and doing what is smart.

▶ 17:16 Amen. It’s you deciding to make good decisions. See, and so we have the gift of God and we have self-control. For let them marry. He says, “Go ahead and let them marry.” See, he’s not down on marriage, but he’s not wanting you to jump into a marriage. He’s trying to teach us that we can handle single life till the time is ripe. You see? So, go ahead and marry. He says, “For it is better to marry than what?” Burn. Well, this b word burn here is only used six times in the New Testament. And it’s talking about a fire, but never help. You know, the guy burned with anger. You know, here it’s burning with what? Sexual desire. See, because if you don’t bring them in control, what’s going to happen?

▶ 18:08 You’re going to commit fornication. And fornicators, sexual immoralities go where? To hell. So you got to get repentance. You got to change that life. So why even get into it? Now [clears verse 12. Throat] To the rest I speak. Who’s the rest? We did the widows. We did the unmarits. Who’s left? The marriage. To the rest. To the marriage I speak. I’m going to give you more of my opinion. Let not, this is not what the Lord says. This is what I’m saying by permission. All right? If any have not a wife or a husband that believes not, or if any have a wife or a husband that believes not, and that unbeliever is pleased to dwell with him or her, let them not put away or divorce that unbelieving spouse.

▶ 19:07 An unbelieving spouse is sanctified by the believing spouse. Else were your children unclean. But now you they are holy. If the unbelieving depart, let him what? Depart. If he divorces you, let it go. See, then what’s the next statement? A brother or sister, see the husband or wife is not under bondage, slavery. In such case. Did you hear that? See, he said what the Lord said, but he’s given you common sense that number one, if the unbelieving spouse wants to depart, they ain’t a thing you can do about it. They’re going to go. I mean, I found that out.

▶ 19:59 All your faith, all your prayer, and every they have to decide. Everybody has to stand before God and choose for themselves. And see, when I was a young Christian, they blamed me for not having enough faith, not living a good enough life to keep my marriage going. Well, people, the Bible says, “Choose you this day.” See, everybody has to choose. And the Bible says that the father is not held accountable for the son of the sin, nor the son is held accountable for the sin of the father. We’re not held accountable for another person’s sins, but they put you under a guilt triple where you didn’t have enough faith. You didn’t live a good enough life. You didn’t live righteous enough or this would not have happened. Well, it did happen. It happened in the Bible. Was David a divorced man? Yeah.

▶ 20:50 Did he choose to be divorced? No, she did. Was David a priest and a king and a prophet in God? Yes. And see, we keep passing on this narrow-minded doctrine that does nothing but bring people into bondage. You know, it’s the sinner that gets punished, not the victim. And you know, in America, the victim is getting punished and the criminal is getting a slap on the hand. Yeah, I think Paul has given us some insight and wisdom. And I’ve known this for a lot of years. I didn’t preach it because I was afraid people would take it and do the wrong, use it an excuse to be sexually permissive, but it gave me the power when people came to me with for counseling and all that, I could tell them, you know, the truth and set them free.

▶ 21:57 [clears God has called us to what? Throat] Peace. Peace is the absence of war, struggle. You see, you’re in a marriage where the guy’s beating you up and, you know, going around, running around on you or the wife is or whatever. You know, that’s not peace, is it? But Christians, oh, you know, I got to stay married. I got to stay married. And and they live a life of hell on earth trying to please a bad spouse that only God can change the heart. No matter how good that person lives, it takes Jesus and them coming to Jesus to change their heart. Are you hearing Paul today? Am I Is the microphone getting his message across clear? All right.

▶ 22:48 Good. Good. [clears. See, it’s better to throat] marry. I mean, it’s better not to marry and burn with sexual desire than to marry the wrong person or to commit sexual immorality. We got to use that gift. We got to use self-control. Now remember they said that the believing sanctified. Sanctified means set apart the unbelieving and set apart the children. Now we know that that’s only partially true because we know the scriptures. Okay? For instance, in the Old Testament, they could go through a ceremony of cleansing and still have what?

▶ 23:40 An evil heart. Ain’t that right? And didn’t po didn’t King Saul do that? He went through the motions, but he still what? Had an evil heart. And so, but because of the believer in the home, listen to this. It’s really good. See, because of that believer’s lifestyle, that person is setting aside the husband, unbelieving husband and the children to be holy. In other words, God’s going to accept the marriage and God’s going to work on the believer’s behalf. Now, church, that’s good stuff. And he says, that’s why you don’t want to just divorce because they’re an unbeliever. If they’re treating you right and things are, you know, going good in the home and and and and you know, you really got a wholesome family, you don’t just run out because in the end, he says, for you don’t know if wife or you can save your husband or husband, you can save your wife.

▶ 24:46 Are you there? By your behavior, by the way, you don’t know if God can use that to get them to turn to Christ. Wow, church. That’s good stuff. This guy wrote a much better book than any book I can find in the Christian bookstore. Really? Now, watch this. 1 Peter 3:1. Wives, be in subjection or submission to your own husband. Not other men, not other husbands. You your own. If any of those spouses obey not the word, see, they might even be a believer but not obeying. You know, there’s a difference between a believer, a disciple, and a mature person.

▶ 25:40 You see, a believer sins, they jealous, they argue, they quarrel, they divide, and uh yeah, they’re just wimpy cryb babies. And I’m saved by grace. Save by grace. A disciple starts restraining themselves, disciplining themselves to stop sinning to seek the word to be like Jesus, disciple, disciplined one. They become a pupil, a learner of Jesus Christ in his ways and they are progressively growing in restraining their life. Are you with me? And a mature person has their senses exercised. Hebrews chapter 5, the end of the chapter, to know right and wrong and do what is right and say no to what is wrong.

▶ 26:33 See, a mature person exercises the work, not just learning it. Amen. And so they can be a believer and be sinning and treat you wrong and lie. They can be taking drugs and all kinds of things. Or they can be an unbeliever. They’re not obeying the word. All right. But without the word, without what? Okay. Without the word. How many you know too much preaching turns into nagging? How many of nagging doesn’t work? Yeah. Yeah. Too much accusation, too much. Come on, man up, boy. Come on, man up. Woman up. Woman up woman or whatever. After a while it just turns into nagging.

▶ 27:26 So he says without the word now we also share the word but in its right season right place and the right way can be won by the what behavior of the wife and vice versa in the kingdom there’s bond or free male nor female you know all the messages is for us all. So what Paul is saying is yes, if you got an unbelieving or you got a believer that’s a baby, hang in there if you can because you can save them by your behavior, by your lifestyle. You don’t know if God can reach them by your lifestyle or not because your lifestyle is preaching the word to them. Wow. Good stuff, isn’t it?

▶ 28:27 See, and even in the Pentecostal charismatic circles that I got saved in and all the rest, there was such an emphasis on tongues, prophecy, miracles, and healing, we didn’t have the right focus on character. And the spouses would go into church and they would shake and scream and roll on the floor and woo and the presence of God. And you know, every once in a while a miracle would happen. But when they went home, man, their mouth, their anger, their finances were a mess. And church, what he’s telling us is, do you really want to your kids to serve Christ? Show them by your lifestyle. So many young people don’t serve Christ because their parents said one thing and lived another.

▶ 29:27 Is Paul good? He is. He’s very good. And see, we turn our kids off because we can’t control our tongue. We can’t control our anger. We can’t control our finances. We don’t show them a lifestyle. We don’t even go to church regularly. We don’t show them the things of God. And then we wonder why they went wrong because we were prayers. Boy, we were there in prayer. We were worshippers. We were there worshiping. We had faith. We believe. We believe God’s going to save my kid. God’s going to save my kid. And he ain’t and your lifestyle is part of the problem. Because if we really pray, we will meet with God, take on his character. If we really worship, we will meet with God, take on his character.

▶ 30:20 If we really get into the word, we will meet with God and take on his character. And our kids will see that character and say, you know,. That’s a better way. Now, folks, I tell you, Paul is hitting something that the whole American church needs to hear. And he’s given permission to speak this.